3 Reasons Why WHO You Know Really Matters



It’s staggering to think you are one of seven billion people alive today! Even more incredible is that you are a unique individual and there has never been nor ever will be anyone just like you. You have a unique combination of experiences, ambitions and social networks which ultimately form your life.

It makes no difference if you are a power broker with thousands of connections or whether you prefer to keep small, tight-knit social circles, one thing is certain: Who you know will have a profound influence on your life, your experiences and ultimately, your successes.

We’ve all heard “it’s who you know” that matters, but here are three compelling reasons why it matters:

1.  Your Connections Create Your World

How you interact with your network of friends and family, coworkers, mentors, teammates and even competitors will ultimately be a reflection of who you are or who you will become. Your interactions will create your environment and life’s experiences. The old saying “it’s not what you know but who you know” bears a lot of truth.

Imagine if Steve Jobs had never met Steve Wozniak.  What if Sergey Brin and Larry Page had decided NOT to work together on indexing the world’s information?  Apple and Google could not have changed the world.  These are extreme examples but the point is the same. Who we connect with and the relationships we cultivate will ultimately shapes our experiences and create the world we live in.


“You are the average of the five people you associate with most, so do not underestimate the effects of your pessimistic, unambitious, or disorganized friends. If someone isn’t making you stronger, they’re making you weaker.”

– Tim Ferris

2.  Your Relationships Influence Your Thinking

Success begins in the mind and if your thoughts are negatively influenced, then you will be fighting an uphill battle.  If your three closest friends are always depressed, broke and angry, then guess what?  You’ll be the fourth.  If your three closest friends are driven, optimistic and successful, then guess what?  You’ll be the fourth.

In all of our relationships, we are either being influenced or we are influencing others.  With this in mind,  you should guard your thoughts  from negative opinions and toxic emotions.  This means you may have to stop associating with certain people.

Seek out and connect with the ambitious, optimistic and success-minded.  Associate with those pursuing similar goals.  Regardless of the goal you’ve set for yourself, there are some key relationships everyone should have to maximize successful thinking.  Read more about Mentors, coaches and mastermind groups.


steve jobs think different

3.  Your Network Influences Your Degree of Success

The successful understand the value of relationships and are strategic about networking and leveraging their contacts to reach their goals.  They almost always have advisors and mentors on their side.  They seek out those that have achieved the level of success they want and learn from them. The successful know they cannot do it all by themselves and collaborate with others to share ideas, motivate each other & find solutions.

Align yourself with those pursuing a similar goal to increase your chances of success.  Connect with those that have already achieved what you’re after and learn from them.

Apart from your mindset, nothing will have more of an impact on your success and happiness than the quality and quantity of your relationships.  Make new connections regularly, seek out positive and like-minded individuals, keep an open mind towards those different from yourself and always remember that in life, relationships are everything.


” The average person wants to meet a millionaire to tell their friends; millionaires want to associate with billionaires to learn how they think.”

– Steve Siebold

1 reply
  1. Toby Nwazor
    Toby Nwazor says:

    Hi Ernie, you nailed this post.

    I have always believed that networking and building solid relationships is a major determinant in how fast we climb the ladder of success.

    I love the example you gave about Steve Jobs. In the same vein, what if Justin Beiber had not been introduced to Usher? I guess Justin will still be singing at open mic shows.

    I wish I could tell more people that they should focus more on building good relationships as they aim for success. I love this post, and i am sharing

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